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December 3rd, 2009
07:07 pm - Words.
Words, words, words.
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March 10th, 2009
08:52 pm - Economist Ho!
I love Paul Krugman.
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November 5th, 2008
November 4th, 2008
12:45 pm - Barack Obama
OMGZ livejournal, I totally voted!
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June 28th, 2008
01:46 pm - Chipmunk
Totally wierd chipmunk removal "services" monologue--almost like a biazzaro found poem:
http://www.unitedwildlife.com/AnimalsChipmunk.html
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July 23rd, 2007
June 6th, 2007
09:05 pm - Under the Sea!
Last weekend my dad took my sister and I to the Jersey shore (I know--Jersey, ew) as a graduation gift. The beach provided mucho opportunitos for relaxation, which I reaped eagerly. My father, being relatively well off, paid for everything, and thus my sister Erin and I ate quite well. The best meal was probably the soft-shell crab, fried as opposed to sautéed. Erin got somewhat screwed due to her aversion to sea-food, but there were plenty of steakeries to whet her appetite.
The beach was harder than Rehoboth’s, like walking on cement covered in grit. However, I came upon a neat sandbar about 20 feet out from the tide line, which made me appear as if I was walking on water.* Also--my keen, Jeffersonian eyes managed to spot a horseshoe crab scuttling over the sandbar in the muddy water, and, following it like a porpoise, I siezed the arthropod with my sea-hands and carried it to my landlubber family. I thought about leaving the poor crab on the beach after I had finished bragging about my exploits (quite loudly, actually) because the water had become chilly, but every time I looked at the poor thing, its cute little legs seemed to tap out: "Et tu, Michael?"
I totally caved. Guess I'm not built for the cut-throat world of undersea politics.
-Michael
*I was actually walking on water.
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May 24th, 2007
03:51 am - So Yeah I Never Update Why Don't You Suck It Down
Brandon and I moved out of our upstairs apartment and will, hopefully soon, take up residence at one of his grandma's split-doubles. It's being all fancified with new everything--it's been vacant for thirty years. That kind of shelf ware takes its toll on the ye ol' structural integrity, not to mention the plumbing is, oh, seventy-seven years out of code. The codes back then mostly centered on miscegenation as opposed to building materials.
Living at Brandon's parent's house presents interesting difficulties. For one, the whole "hey, I'm your son's homosexual lover but LETS NOT TALK ABOUT IT EVER OR I'LL JUST KILL MYSELF!!!!111one" implication, while a little weird, takes on all kinds of new dimensions when your forced to pretend you sleep in a different room while really sneaking through the bathroom so you can enjoy a good night's sleep with your beloved. However, his parents have been very nice to me, and though Brandon doesn't get along well with his mother, he's been trying extra-hard not to foment awkward situations. I think we'll both be more at ease upon moving in to our new place.
I'd like to get a dog, but Brandon doth not approve. Mayhap I should drug him with morphine--like the alcoholics of old?
As for employment, I haven't seriously begun looking. Brandon's mom mentioned substitute teaching, and I immediately imagined myself stomping down the halls with a ream of times-tables worksheets and word-searches under my arm, willing to deploy them at a moments notice to keep These Damn Kids from rioting, all the while listening to rock and roll music via a hidden earpiece, wondering...
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March 26th, 2007
12:00 pm - Form Blazing Sword
The whole graduate school thing, despite doing incredibly well on my GREs and working just about as hard as I possibly could, isn't panning out with the sort of providence I imaged. I figured if I did everything I was supposed to--study hard, etc.--then of course I would succeed in at least one circumstance. In this case, Manifest Destiny, a frame of mind I must have inherited from my Indian-killing ancestors, failed completely and utterly. Who knew hard work doesn't actually yield results? That I would have been precisely $1000 better off had I been lazy and done nothing.
To tell the truth, I'm not very depressed over the outcome. AWP, which I attended with my friend Danielle (who is, coincidentally, a Navajo--perhaps all this is some karmic atonement for my white boy past; THANKS A LOT DANIELLE), turned out to suck, totally. The people at the conference came in one of a few types: The desperate no-talent hack, the completely pathetic aging hippy or the smarmy networking academic. The experience convinced me that, perhaps, the path of liberal arts academia was one fraught with peril, and the universe may in fact be warning me with that emaciated pile of rejection letters next to my computer.
So, in two months, onward into the great unknown. Earlier I figured I'd hearken to the "Go West" cliche and settle in Santa Fe or San Fransisco, but that's not the place for me. The East Coast will always be my home sweet home. The next best direction may be to "Go Slightly South." My friend Simon lives in Richmond. From what he says, it seems like a charming little city, and I'd be happier living with a few friends than isolated in a new locale, forced to establish new social connections and the like. If I remember correctly from my childhood moves, such finagling can be exhausting, and I'm fairly picky when it comes to friendship. Who would have thought I'd end up in a red state of my own voilition?
-Michael
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November 22nd, 2006
November 7th, 2006
02:38 pm - Weeeee
It felt so good to vote against Rick Santorum. I had to a stifle a victorious cackle.
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July 29th, 2006
03:37 pm - Should Exempt Me from The GREs
| You Passed 8th Grade Science | 
Congratulations, you got 8/8 correct! |
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April 19th, 2006
05:34 pm - RIP Scott McClellan
May angels of spin sing thee to thy rest.
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April 14th, 2006
02:28 pm - Soap Lines
I caught my mom watching "As The World Turns" just as one of the handsome-yet-mysterious characters uttered the line: "Meet me at the old mill, ok?"
Ah, yes! The old mill. How could I forget?
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April 10th, 2006
06:58 pm - Pasta Salad
With the completion of my Theory and Practice paper (on human radiation experiments and eugenics--yeah I know it's cool), I'm more or less done with the bulk of schoolwork for this year. I plan on spending the rest of the semester partying as much as I can, perhaps even taking a trip up to State College to partyxor with Ken and Chris…xor. Plus I need to look for a job over the summer, but who gives a fuck.
I celebrated the end of school-stress by preparing a pasta salad with olive oil, assorted seasonings and tuna fish.
Next semester I'm taking an honors seminar on pirates.
That makes me cooler than you.
-Michael
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April 9th, 2006
03:19 pm - Twenty One
I had my 21st birthday this weekend. My friends from back east came up---Ken and Christina. A whole caravan packed the house on Friday night, followed by a smaller but still badass group of folks (NOT TERRORISTS) on Saturday. We had a blast, and I blacked out for at least an hour and a half while I drunk dialed about everyone on my phone, including my mom. Anyway, I enjoyed the festivities. I'm glad we honored our dead homies.
Mad Dog!
-Michael
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February 4th, 2006
December 27th, 2005
December 24th, 2005
December 20th, 2005
12:12 am - What's a Jew to Do?
War on Christmas my ass. It's pretty hard not to celebrate Christmas in the states:
http://www.jewfaq.org/xmas.htm
-Michael
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